The Best (and Worst) Clean Dad Jokes for All Ages 👋

Where do dads store their dad jokes? In the dad-a-base.

Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems.

What’s the best air to breathe if you want to be rich? Millionaire.

Why did the baseball player get arrested? He stole third base.

What did the evil chicken lay? Deviled eggs.

What kind of bird works on a construction site? A crane.

People whose jobs require them to enter someone else's house, such as plumbers and electricians, what is the weirdest thing you've seen at a customer's house? My wife.

New types of sliced loaf aren't invented, or discovered... They're bread.

Went to the doctor today and rasped, "There seems to be a few spoons and forks stuck in my throat." He chuckled, "It's not that serious but..." "You'll need to have utensils taken out."

‌‌I m‌‌et a‌‌ g‌‌irl a‌‌t a‌‌ c‌‌lub t‌‌he o‌‌ther n‌‌ight &‌‌ s‌‌he t‌‌old m‌‌e s‌‌he'd s‌‌how m‌‌e a‌‌ g‌‌ood t‌‌ime. When w‌‌e g‌‌ot o‌‌utside, s‌‌he r‌‌an a‌‌ 4‌‌0 y‌‌ard d‌‌ash i‌‌n 4‌‌.8 s‌‌econds.

How did the dentist become a brain surgeon? His drill slipped.

What’s the difference between unlawful and illegal? Unlawful includes things like drunk driving or robbery, whereas illegal is a sick bird.

My girlfriend is like the temperature of a molecule. Doesn't exist by definition.

I was at a job interview today when the manager handed me his laptop and said "I want you to try to sell this to me." So I put it under my arm, walked out of the building, and went home.Eventually he called me and said "Bring my laptop back here right now!"I said "$200 and it's yours."

A cook got his hand caught in the dish-washer and they were both fired.