The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes About Dads 👋

What’s an astronaut’s favorite part of the computer? The Space Bar.

I was discussing my final wishes with my adult children when I said "Regarding disposition of my ashes ... I have no burning desires about what you do with them"(This actually happened tonight IRL, and it was not a Dad Joke, just an inadvertent pun)

In chemistry class the experiment called for 36 grams of the 83rd element on the periodic table. I could see that the girl next to me had weighed out 42 grams. When I told her she was getting a bit heavy she said.... I should mind my own bismuth.

A woman walks up to a librarian and asks, "Do you have any books on Pavlov's dogs and Schrodinger's cat?" The librarian replies, "It rings a bell, but I don't know if it's here or not."

I wanted to watch a music movie... But it was full of sax and violins.

I asked my dad for his best dad joke and he said, 'You.'"

Why do peppers make such good archers? Because they habanero.

What do you call a fibbing cat? A lion.

What do you call a lazy kangaroo? Pouch potato.

What did the Japanese cannibal eat for dinner? Raw men

I like to spend my weekends playing chess with elderly men in the park. But it’s becoming more difficult. You try finding exactly32 old guys.

My friend was showing me his tool shed and pointed to a ladder. 'That's my stepladder,' he said. 'I never knew my real ladder.'

How do you talk to a giant? You use big words!

I begin to read a horror novel in Braille. Something bad is about to happen, I can feel it.

What do you call someone who refuses to fart in public? A private tutor.