The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes for Adults 👋

A son tells his father, “I have an imaginary girlfriend.” The father sighs and says, “You know, you could do better.” “Thanks Dad,” the son says. “That means a lot.” The father shakes his head and goes, “I was talking to your girlfriend.”

They say that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Well, not if it’s poisoned. Then the antidote becomes the most important.

Me and my best friend had an argument yesterday So, I stole his wheelchair because I was angry at him.You'll never guess who came crawling back[Note: I don't mean anyone anything by this. It's just a joke. Please don't get offended]

If cats could talk They wouldn't.

What kind of television is gay? An LG TV

There is only one true way to check virginity Check the label on the back of the bottle

Flowers On Valentine’s Day I came home with a dozen roses for my wife. She looked at me and said “so I guess you want me to spread my legs now?”I said, “well, I kinda thought we’d put them in a vase.”

Food enters from a pair of cheeks Comes out from a pair of cheeks too!

Trump did a better job getting people to exercise in 1 month than Michelle Obama did in 8 years Look at all those protesters on the streets!

“Finally, I caught them all”, said Ash as he walked out of the STI clinic

A man walks up to 3 women wearing potato sacks. How does he know which one is the prostitute? The one whose sack reads "Idaho"

As i see a homeless man asking for some money and i wonder, should i really let money get wasted on drugs?... Nah i better give them to this homeless guy

In Colombia, kids have built a snowman. The police guessed snowman's value at approximately $400 million.

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.

I asked my date to meet me at the gym but she never showed up. I guess the two of us aren't going to work out.