The Best (and Worst) Dirty & Inappropriate Dad Jokes 👋
Buckle up, buttercup! This ain’t your grandpa’s joke book. Enter at your own risk for dad jokes that have gone rogue. Prepare for puns that push the boundaries, one-liners with a wink, and humor that’s definitely not safe for the dinner table. In Dirty & Inappropriate Dad Jokes, you’ll find a collection of puns and one-liners that have taken a mischievous turn. Consider yourself warned – these jokes are definitely not for the faint of heart or polite company.
A guy I wanted to date demanded I disclose my bust size first He said he only deals with known quantitties.
It’s because they can’t see sh!t at night.
What do you call an obese psychic? A four-chin teller.
I got fired from my job at the sperm bank today Apparently dipping your finger in the sample cup and saying “oh this is spicy I actually asked for mild” is frowned upon
What do you call a zipper that keeps snagging your dick? A penis fly trap.
What’s tighter than a dead virgin? My alibi
If you care so much about my mental health... ...then gimme some brain
It’s brave to admit you have an STD. Always clap for those folks!
It's easy to convince ladies not to eat Tide Pods, but harder to deter gents.
Beer brewery manager on the phone with Mrs Jones: "Afraid I have bad news. Your husband fell into a vat of beer this morning." Mrs Jones started weeping. "Did he go quickly?" "He climbed out three times - but only to pee."
Which one doesn't belong: eggs, your wife, or a blow job? The blow job. You can beat your eggs and your wife but you can't beat a blow job.
What is the best thing about a blow job? You get five minutes of peace and quiet.
What does Disney and Viagra have in common? You wait 3 hours for a 3 minute ride.
My sister asked for me to bring her something hard to write on I don't know why she became so mad. It's pretty fucking hard to write on sand.
Guy walks into his bedroom with a goat under his arm... He says, "This is the pig I fuck when you're not around.His wife says, "You dumb asshole, that's a goat, not a pig."He shoots back, "Who the hell did you think I was talking to?"