The Best (and Worst) Funniest Dad Jokes for Adults 👋

I walked up to a woman in a bar and said “hey, baby, if you were a fruit you’d be a fine-apple.” She responded “and if you were a fruit, women would rejoice.”

I have a joke about being an electrician, but it’s too shocking.

What form of birth control works better with holes in it? Crocs

I saw 2 kids beating up a kid in an alleyway, so I stepped in to help. He didn’t stand a chance against 3 of us.

My ex and I had a very amicable divorce. I know this because when I posted on Facebook, 'I’m getting a divorce,' she was the first one to like it.

Indiana Jones, Lara Croft, and Nathan Drake walk into an ancient temple that has been lost for centuries. They blow it up.

Why can’t you eat Wookie meat? Because it’s too chewy…

Four guys are hanging out One of them says, “Hey, did you know 1 out of ever 4 guys is gay?”Larry says, “I hope it’s chuck because he’s really cute.”

You know what the scientists always say to build up resistance to distractions and channel nature Ohmmmmmmmmmmmm

What did the zipper say to the dick? Wanna hang out?

*Police Alert* Two men wanted for stealing a cement mixer. Caution is advised. They are hardened criminals.

Hey girl, are you from Iraq? Coz you look Saddam fine when you Baghdad ass up.

How would you describe summer in one word? Summary

I went to a party, but to my horror, everyone was wearing costumes! I opened my wallet, pulled out a condom and rolled it over my nose. The frowning host asked me, "What're you supposed to be!?" I replied, "Fuck knows."

I was once a personal trainer, until I gave a too-weak notice.