The Best (and Worst) Funniest Dad Jokes for Adults 👋

What do you call a pansexual man named Nick who works at a cd store? Pan Nick at the disc co

When your date shows up in a white suit that's covered in honey... You know she's gonna be a keeper.

I walked up to a woman in a bar and said “hey, baby, if you were a fruit you’d be a fine-apple.” She responded “and if you were a fruit, women would rejoice.”

Both a surgeon and a tattoo artist have to have a steady hand, With the surgeon it's the difference between life and death, with the tattoo artist it's the difference between a beautiful mermaid and a fat bitch with an fish up her ass

You used to be able to get air for free at gas stations, but now it's a $ That's inflation for you.

Where do you find a cow with no legs? Wherever you left it.

One of my wife’s primary School’s student was wearing a Fitbit watch One of my wife’s primary School’s student was wearing a Fitbit watch, which prompted my wife to ask, “Are you tracking your steps?” “No,” said the little girl. “I wear this for Mum so she can show Dad when he gets home.”

I find it hard to talk openly about the holes in my hands and feet Just feels likes there’s a lot of stigmata attached

What concert costs just 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback!'

Vin Diesel eats two meals a day. Breakfast and breakfurious.

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accidentally swallowed a bag of scrabble letters my next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster.

What do cows most like to read? Cattle-logs.

A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend." The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better." "Thanks Dad," the son says. "That means a lot." The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."

Do mascara and lipstick ever argue? Sure, but then they makeup.