The Best (and Worst) Funny Fatherhood Jokes 👋

The world tongue-twister champion just got arrested. I hear they’re gonna give him a really tough sentence.

In my free time, I like to help blind people. Verb, not adjective.

I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.

What did the fish say when he hit the wall? Dam.'

It hurts me to say this, but … I have a sore throat.

I found a wooden shoe in my toilet today. It was clogged.

I tried to get a smart car the other day but they sold out too fast. Why? I guess I'm just a bit slow.

I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes. Turns out it was the refrigerator all along.'

I once wrote a song about a tortilla, but it's more of a wrap.

Can February March? No, but April May!'

How do you get a farm girl to like you? A tractor.

I wonder what my parents did to fight boredom before the internet. I asked my eighteen brothers and sisters but they didn’t have any idea either.

I like telling Dad jokes. Sometimes he laughs!'

Why does Sherlock Holmes love Mexican restaurants? They give him good case ideas.

I was sitting on the back porch with my wife when I suddenly blurted out, 'I love you.' 'Is that you or the beer talking?' she asked. I answered, 'It’s me… talking to my beer.'