The Best (and Worst) Funny Fatherhood Jokes 👋

Members of the Flat Earth Society are having a particularly rough time during the pandemic. They say the 6 ft social distancing measures are pushing many of them over the edge.

I heard that Kelly McGillis won’t be returning for Top Gun 2. Guess which other Top Gun actor won’t have a cameo in the sequel? Goose.

Guess who’s getting some head tonight My pillow

TIL: Many medieval surnames like Fletcher or Cooper refer to the patriarch's traditional occupation. I guess I won't be marrying Mr. Dickinson.

A goat tells her boyfriend she's pregnant. He immediately replies, "What? You're kidding!"To which she replies back, "Yeah, that's what I said."

Potatoes are taking over the world... They say it's the rise of the mashines

John Cena's full name is "John Felix Anthony Cena Jr." Didn't see that one coming.

Two gentlemen are walking through the West End on their way to a show. One turns to the other and says, “I have a feeling a large number of right-wing wazzocks are going to be there tonight. Trust me, you’ll see the... Queue anon.

Mother In Law A husband and wife had a fight.Wife called her mom: He fought with me again, I am coming to stay with you.Mom: No dear, he must pay for his mistake. I am coming to stay with you!

What’s the difference between a jumper and a sweater? A sweater doesn’t go splat after falling 40 stories...

What did the policeman say to his stomach? You’re under a vest.

My wife's gonna leave me because of a spelling mistake. I'm on a work trip and I just texted her "having a wonderful time, wish you were her."

I heard a local shoe store was doing a promo to increase sales. Buy one, get another one free.

If the Swan represents happiness, then what bird symbolizes true love? The Swallow.(This is my third anniversary posting this joke on a time line near Valentines. My yearly repost if you will)

I had to throw out all of my danish currency I didn't wanna catch the Kronervirus