The Best (and Worst) Funny Fatherhood Jokes 👋

Son: Dad, can I watch the TV? Dad: Sure, just don’t turn it on.

I didn't want to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a traffic cop, but when I got home, all the signs were there.

Why are spiders so smart? They can find everything on the web.

I’ve never gone to a gun range before. I decided to give it a shot!

I have a joke about trickle down economics. But 99% of you will never get it.

Not to brag but I made six figures last year. I was also named worst employee at the toy factory.

I haven't spoken to my wife in four years. I thought it would be rude to interrupt her!

Mommy, what were you doing bouncing on Daddy's stomach last night? -I have to do that or Daddy's belly gets very fat. Bouncing keeps him skinny.-That's not going to work.-Why not?-Because the babysitter keeps blowing him back up.

How many narcissists does it take to change a light bulb? None, they all use gaslighting.

Me and another coworker were competing to see who was the best at our drug testing job. I was winning until i misplaced a felon's probation samples. So I guess I lost that pissing contest

I told my Dad that crazy people have taken over the White House He said, "So nothing new then"

If Trump took part in a beauty peagent, he would be crowned Miss..... ..... interpretation

So I told my girlfriend someone's out there making owl noises and she's like "who"

I'm not sure how much you know about the story of the Titanic... ...but what caused it to sink is just the tip of the iceberg.

Did you hear about the rumours about Iraq? I heard they are going to invade America in order to install democracy there.