The Best (and Worst) Work-Related Dad Jokes 👋

I just spent $300 on a limo and learned it doesn't come with a driver. I can't believe I have nothing to chauffer it.

Why did the employee get fired from the keyboard factory? He wasn’t putting in enough shifts.

My boss asked me why I only get sick on work days. I said it must be my weekend immune system.

LPT: The key to job security is not just cultivating a strong relationship with your boss, but your boss' boss as well. Having constant open dialogue, strengthening trust, and exhibiting vulnerability is key especially during periods of layoffs... That way over time you'll hopefully build up enough black mail material to against them in case they ever want to fire you.

I like to spend my weekends playing chess with elderly men in the park. But it’s becoming more difficult. You try finding exactly32 old guys.

I was playing chess with my friend and he said, 'Let’s make this interesting.' So we stopped playing chess.

How do you teach kids about taxes? Eat 38% of their ice cream.

TIFU my IT job interview when I was asked to give an example of role-based security. Apparently, six ply toilet paper was not the correct answer.

I asked the IT guy, 'How do you make a Motherboard?' He said, 'I tell her about my job.'

I asked the IT guy, "How do you make a Motherboard?" He said, "I tell her about my job."

What do astronauts eat for protein? Launch Meat.

How many telemarketers does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but he has to do it during dinner.

What do workers in a tea factory never get? Coffee breaks

A company owner was asked a question, How do you motivate your employees to be so punctual?"He smiled & replied, "It's simple. I have 30 employees and 29 free parking spaces. One is paid parking."

My landlord told me we need to talk about the heating bill. 'Sure,' I said. 'My door is always open.'