The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes About Amazon & Tech 👋

If CNN released photos of Stormy Daniels & Trump Do you know what he'd call them?Fake Nudes.

My friend just became an American citizen, but he was forced to give up his Chinese citizenship. It’s been a real disorienting experience for him.

A bunch of youths pull up next to Lewis Hamilton at set of traffic lights One of them rolls his window down, and Lewis winds his down too'Oi mate!' says the lad 'Race?''Afro-Caribbean' says Lewis, smirking. And speeds off

A German soldier, Japanese soldier, and Italian soldier were interrogated A German soldier said he would not speak, but he did. The Japanese soldier said he would resist, but he spoke, and the Italian soldier was the only one who did not speak. When they asked him how he resisted, he said "my hands were tied"

Yesterday I was charged $10,000 dollars for sending my cat into space. It was a cat astro fee.

What's a robot's favorite snack?' 'Computer chips.'

Why did the computer get glasses? To improve its website.

I asked the librarian if books about paranoia were avaiable.

Of all the inventions of the last 100 years, the dry erase board has to be the most remarkable.

When the grocery store checker asks me if I want my milk in a bag, I say no, I’d rather keep it in the carton.

After Trump changes course of hurricane with a sharpie House approves budget of 12 crayons for border wall

Good thing I had a CVS receipt in my wallet... The men’s room was out of toilet paper.

My wife laughed at me when I told her I could make a car out of macaroni. You should've seen her face when I drove pasta!

I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I’ll let you know.

I bought Spotify premium for an uninterrupted music experience. But I still hear my wife’s bickering between songs.