The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes About Dads 👋
Celebrate fatherhood with our collection of dad jokes about dads! These hilarious, self-deprecating jokes poke fun at the quirks and classic moments of being a dad. Whether you’re a dad yourself or just love the humor that comes with fatherhood, our dad jokes about dads will have you laughing and groaning in equal measure. Perfect for sharing with fellow dads or just enjoying on your own, these jokes are all about embracing the dad life with a smile!
So the other day I said to me wife - you know seems like these days we only have Social Security sex." She gives me a strange look - "Social Security sex?"I said "Yeah, you know, I get a little each month, but not enough to live on.
For his birthday, I got my son an alarm clock that swears at him instead of beeping. He’s in for a rude awakening.
So, Jesus and Satan are sitting on a park bench one day ...just chilling, and Satan asks, "Hey JC, what's it called when little chunks of ice fall from the sky? It's not like I get to see it very often."Jesus says, "Hail, Satan."And Satan's all like, "YEEEEEAH, BOI!"And Jesus is all like, "Oh, you."
My vegetarian wife wanted the egg smell gone from the pan in which I cooked scrambled egg So i cooked beef in it.
A kid decided to burn his house down. His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm around the mom and said, 'That’s arson.'
If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?' 'Pilgrims.'
She looked up and whispered, “They’re right behind you'.
Dad: Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Son: No. What happened? Dad: The teacher woke him up.
You think swimming with sharks is expensive? Swimming with sharks cost me an arm and a leg.'
A witch's vehicle goes brrrroom brrrroom!
A father tells his son that he was adopted. “I want to meet my biological parents,” the son demands. “We are your biological parents,” the father responds. “Now pack up, the new ones will pick you up in twenty minutes.”
A woman crashed her car. She told the policeman the man she collided with was on his phone and drinking a can of beer. The policeman said he can do what he likes in his own living room.
I saw a poster on a tree with a man's face. It read: "MISSING PERSON! REWARD £150". Would you believe it...I was out on a pleasant walk the day after when I found that very guy tied up in the woods down by the river.So regretfully, I had to give him the £150.
My niece stabbed me with a red crayon today... It drew blood
I think my calendar is broken... Haha, April Fools!It works just fine.