The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes About Dads 👋
Celebrate fatherhood with our collection of dad jokes about dads! These hilarious, self-deprecating jokes poke fun at the quirks and classic moments of being a dad. Whether you’re a dad yourself or just love the humor that comes with fatherhood, our dad jokes about dads will have you laughing and groaning in equal measure. Perfect for sharing with fellow dads or just enjoying on your own, these jokes are all about embracing the dad life with a smile!
I asked the librarian if books about paranoia were available. She looked up and whispered, "They're right behind you".
Where do terrorists go when they die? Everywhere.
What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh.
Why can't your hand be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
What do you give a sick lemon? Lemon-aid.
I found a wooden shoe in my toilet today. It was clogged.
What do houses wear? An address.
What do you say to your sister when she’s crying? Are you having a Crisis?
I told him, 'I think we’ll still be using mirrors in five years.'
Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I’m not going to spread it!
A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, 'What do you want?' The man says, 'Oh, just some fruit punch.' The bartender sighs and shakes his head, 'If you want punch, you're gonna have to wait in line.' The man looks around, but there is no punchline.
Why is grass so dangerous? Because it’s full of blades.
A friend of mine didn’t pay his exorcist. He got repossessed.
What do you say to your sister when she’s crying? Are you having a Crisis?