The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes for Adults 👋

I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now.

How do flat-earthers travel? On a plane.

Why did the man fall down the well? Because he couldn't see that well!

What do you call a line you wait in to buy a grill? A Barbe-Queue.

They're coming out with a Dragon Ball Z for old people. It's called Draggin' Balls Z

I heard Tiger Woods has been hitting the gym lately Been crushing legs

Why did the horny rebellion only last two minutes? Because everyone came

I think my brother is actually my step brother Apparently everyone I played call of duty with fucked my mom

200 IQ baby Father: “Say Daddy”Baby: “Mommy”Father: “No, say Daddy”Baby: “Mommy”Father: “Fuck you! Say Daddy!”Baby: “Fuck you”*Mother arrives home*Mother: Honey, I’m back! How’s the baby?Baby: “Fuck you”Mother: “What?! Who taught you that a... read more

How many cops does it take to push a black man down the stairs? None, reports say he fell

I used to be a motorcycle courier... Man those things are heavy..

Events on Capitol Hill have gotten pretty dark Any darker and the police might actually do something about it

One of my friends is writing a book about the speech patterns of prison and the criminals inside In other words, the prose and cons of jail

Both a surgeon and a tattoo artist have to have a steady hand, With the surgeon it's the difference between life and death, with the tattoo artist it's the difference between a beautiful mermaid and a fat bitch with an fish up her ass

My idea of holding a summer vacation school to help kids with severe ADHD failed. Do you think it's because I called it a "Concentration Camp?"