The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes for Adults 👋

People keep talking about black holes I guess they have a lot of mass appeal.

After World War 2, France seriously considered changing its name. Unfortunately Iran was already taken.

Why does Santa have prostate cancer? Because he only cums once a year.

We have a saying here in Alabama, “Playing a game and having it end in a tie is like kissing your sister.” It’s fucking awesome because you didn’t lose

The election of Vladimir Putin will commence in a few days Citizens will be asked to choose between Putin and the firing squad.As of now, 80% of the population approve of him.>!The rest 20% are missing!<

Kid : " What are condoms used for?" Dad : " To avoid such questions. "

My girlfriend left me because I’m a big Star Wars fan Looks like tonight I’ll be Han Solo.

You know that scent of moth balls? If so- you're some weird freak spreading its legs to sniff it.

I bought some pantyhose but they kept telling me climate change wasn't real I should have checked the Denier rating

My family keeps telling me that when I die I should have my ashes made into a diamond There's a lot of pressure

A team of thugs broke in to the Pfizer plant and stole all the viagra Police say to be on the lookout for a gang of hardened criminals.

There's a new men's birth control pill that's about the size of a marble. Don't get discouraged though, you don't have to swallow it or anything, you just put it into your shoe… And it makes you limp…

A mother in law said to her son's wife when their baby was born: "I don't mean to be rude but he doesn't look anything like my son." The daughter-in-law lifted her skirt and said: "I don't mean to be rude either, but this is a pussy, not a fucking photo-copier."

So I read my mom's ID card today She's so bad at sex, that she got an F in it

Why is every American receiving a $1200 check? Because Trump always pay off the people he's fucked.