The Best (and Worst) Dirty & Inappropriate Dad Jokes 👋
Buckle up, buttercup! This ain’t your grandpa’s joke book. Enter at your own risk for dad jokes that have gone rogue. Prepare for puns that push the boundaries, one-liners with a wink, and humor that’s definitely not safe for the dinner table. In Dirty & Inappropriate Dad Jokes, you’ll find a collection of puns and one-liners that have taken a mischievous turn. Consider yourself warned – these jokes are definitely not for the faint of heart or polite company.
Why don't racoons ever get COVID? They always wearing a mask and washing their hands. This is my first dad joke! Hopefully my last.
What is the definition of torque? When you have to piss with morning wood, you push your dick down so hard that your feet fly out from under you. That's torque.
I hate sphynx cats because I prefer hairy pussy
Why are farmers always the best husbands? They always produce the best seeds.
What form of birth control works better with holes in it? Crocs
A guy goes to a costume party wearing only underpants The host says "What are you supposed to be?"The guy replies "I'm a premature ejaculation. I just came in my underwear."
So I got out of the bathroom. Spoke to a friend saying " I can't believe thier still together after that shit."My friend said "Who"And I responded "My ass cheeks"
Patient: am I gonna be fine, doctor? Doctor: I doubt it. Mercury is in Uranus.Patient: I'm not into this astrology shit.Doctor: Me neither, my thermometer just broke.
What's a long, hard, mouthful that a Polish woman gets on her wedding night? A Polish surname
Why did the soldier blow himself up when he found out about exploding devices He wanted to C4 himself
The next person that asks me for a pineapple juice a cranberry juice and some lemonade with a slice of orange all in the same glass is gonna get a punch..
The Beach Boys walk into a bar "Round?""Round?""Get a round""I get a round?""Get a round...""Fuck off" said the bababa bababarman.
A woman goes to the doctors complaining of stomach cramps. She gets sent off for some test and comes back a week later. "Well, I hope you're ready for endless sleepless nights of crying and changing dirty nappies!" the doc says. "Wow, you mean I'm pregnant?" the woman replies thrilled. Doc says, "No, you've got bowel cancer."
What sound does an ambulance make when a child predator gets injured? PE-DO PE-DO PE-DO!
What do you get when you mix a turtle and female genitalia? A clitortise