The Best (and Worst) Jokes About Your Dad 👋
Celebrate the classic dad moments with our collection of jokes about your dad! These jokes poke fun at all the funny, quirky, and relatable things dads do. Whether you’re joking about their dad habits or their go-to one-liners, our jokes about your dad are perfect for sharing with friends or family. Explore the funniest dad-centric humor that highlights all the lovable (and sometimes embarrassing) sides of fatherhood!
A Muslim schoolgirl is complaining that she has been excluded from her Camden school for wearing a veil. Ironically, if she lived in a Muslim country she could wear a veil to her heart's content, she just wouldn't be allowed to go to school.
I recently broke it off with a pair of conjoined twins. I said, "It's not you, it's you."
NSFW: My wife suggested bringing toys into the bedroom to spice things up. So I fisted her with hulk hands.
My 7 year old nephew showed me with pride the "telephone" he had just made from a string and two tin cans. I pulled out my iPhone and said, "That's nice, but..." "Look at what kids your age make in China!"
My dad died last year when my family couldn't remember his blood type in time for the paramedics to give him a blood transfusion. As he was dying he kept insisting, "Be positive!", but it's difficult to be positive without him.
Just got back from a job interview where I was asked if I could perform under pressure. I said I wasn’t too sure about that but I could do a wicked 'Bohemian Rhapsody.'
What did the janitor say when he jumped out the closet? “Supplies!”
To the person who stole my glasses: I will find you. I have contacts.
What did the pecan say to the walnut it was chasing? I’ll cashew eventually!
Why does a husband lead a dog's life? He comes in with muddy feet, gets comfortable by the fire, and waits to be fed.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What does a house wear? Address! (A dress)
Where do you learn all about ice cream? Sundae school.
You can't spell par entry without "try."
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school. It's ok he woke up.