The Best (and Worst) Twitter Trending Dad Jokes 👋

Fifty Shades of Grey beat the record for fastest selling R-rated movie in history... Well, first it tied the record... then it beat it....[credit goes to the Late Night with Seth Meyers writers]

Given how much damage Trump is doing to the environment... his secret service code name is officially "Agent Orange".

If you see a robbery at an Apple Store does that make you an iWitness?

How do you measure the mass of an influencer's following? By Instagrams!

“Siri,” I asked my phone, “why am I so bad with women?" She responded, “I’m Bixby, you moron.”

Drinking in IT terms 1 shot= Demo 2 shots= Trial version 5 shots= Personal edition Half a bottle= Professional Edition Full bottle= Network Edition Two bottles= Small Business Edition Five Bottles= Enterprise Edition Whole case= C... read more

Today I asked my daughter for a phone book... She said "you're such a boomer" and handed me her phone. So, now, the spiders dead, my daughters phone is broken, and she's really pissed at me now..

What do you call an instigated collection of instruments? An inclination of 1080p music

Today at the gym, i asked a girl what her new year's resolution was She said ''Fuck you''so i'm pretty excited for 2022

I bought some pantyhose but they kept telling me climate change wasn't real I should have checked the Denier rating

Reddit has gone fully green to help the environment. Their front page is made of 100% recycled material.

Why did Karen press Ctrl+Shift+Delete? Because she wanted to see the task manager.

Rich people have... Rich people have colon cleansesPoor people have taco bell

I searched for a lighter on Amazon, but all I could find was 401 matches…

Internet Explorer is so slow in catching up that... Microsoft Edge had to go back in time to tell Internet Explorer that it has been replaced