The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes About Dads 👋
Celebrate fatherhood with our collection of dad jokes about dads! These hilarious, self-deprecating jokes poke fun at the quirks and classic moments of being a dad. Whether you’re a dad yourself or just love the humor that comes with fatherhood, our dad jokes about dads will have you laughing and groaning in equal measure. Perfect for sharing with fellow dads or just enjoying on your own, these jokes are all about embracing the dad life with a smile!
A British tabloid has just run a story about how self conscious I am. Its really upset me, I hate seeing myself in The Mirror.
I accidentally stepped on one of my friends squash. I feel so bad. He told me not even ten minutes before hand that I'd butternut squash it.
What do two tomatoes do after not seeing each other for a long period of time? A ketchup
Seriously, she has Multiple Personality Disorder? Yeah, crazy right. Sharon is Karen.
A family takes their sick dog to the vet. The vet picks the dog up and studies him. Finally, the vet says "I'm really sorry but I'm gonna have to put him down.""Why?", asks the shocked family. "What's wrong with him?""Nothing major", replied the vet. "He's just really heavy."
CLEAN THE POOL! My wife’s been bugging me to vacuum the pool for months. I tried telling her “If the water’s healthy enough for those tadpoles, it’s good enough for the kids”. I think she’s being a little too bossy.
I told my son I'm named after Thomas Jefferson. He says, But dad, your name is Brian. I respond, I know, but I was named AFTER Thomas Jefferson.
What do you call a person who tells dad jokes but has no kids? A faux pa.
What did the buffalo say to its son when he left? Bison!
How do you get a farm girl to marry you? First, a tractor.
What are the strongest days of the week? Saturday and Sunday. All the others are weekdays.
Why do hamburgers go south for the winter? So they don’t freeze their buns.
Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they're so good at it.
I just got my doctor's test results and I’m really upset. Turns out, I’m not gonna be a doctor.
Where do burgers go dancing? At the meatball.