The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes for Adults 👋

It's easy to convince ladies not to eat Tide Pods, but harder to deter gents.

What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? Does this taste funny to you?

My wife told me she’ll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer. I’m not too worried, I think she’s jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf

How do nonbinary people hurt each other? They slash them. (They/them)

In fact, if you sneer at any other method of measuring liquids, you may be held in contempt of quart.

My dad died because he couldn’t remember his blood type. He kept insisting we “be positive,” but it’s just so hard without him.

When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don’t find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.

My boss asked me why I only get sick on work days. I said it must be my weekend immune system.

*Walks in on my dad inserting a bullet up his ass* My dad: ''Don't worry, I'm just fucking around''

Feel like hearing a dark joke? turn off the lights before doing knock knock

NSFW what'd the sodomite say to his spouse after an argument lets put a plug in it

Why is it so hard to keep track of counting in Afghanistan? Because of the Taliban(say it out loud)

Hutterite Jokes How did the Hutterite man find his daughter in the woods?Quite satisfyingWhat do you call the sweat between two hutterites having sex?relative humidity

What do you call a person who studies the color blue? A cyantologist.

I often get asked what it's like to work as both a writer and a scammer... I just say that it has its own Prose and Cons