The Best (and Worst) Horrible & Terrible Dad Jokes 👋

People make mistakes That's why a pencil has an eraser and Katie has gonorrhea

Just put my father's ashes in the bin. I wish he'd stop smoking or just empty the tray himself.

Santa Claus is a douchebag... He made my wife sit on his lap, asked if she’s been naughty this year then laughed and repeatedly called her a ho.

"Two steaks please", I asked the writer. "Rare for me, medium rare for my friend." He brought us a lovely bit of panda and a nice chunk of giraffe.

There was an italian couple that went in Spain for holidays. A typical plate in Spain are the balls of the bull. They went in a restaurant and ordered them. When the plate camed there were some little balls. So they asked the waiter why they were that small.He said: it don't always pass good for the bullfighter.

I met a girl who told me that she is an autism specialist. Turns out she works at Gamestop.

I shot a bullet into the air and it hit my hand. On one hand I’m really happy that it didn’t hit my head and kill me, but on the other hand I have a big gaping hole now.

I have an idea for a restaurant, it’s a mixture of Jimmy John’s and a strip club I’ll call it “Jimmy Dongs”

Little Ahmed is doing his biology homework. He comes upon a question: "What separates the head from the body?"Ahmed answers: "The axe"

"push push...harder.. you can do it.. little more!!" I was yelling at my pregnant wife.. But despite her best efforts,the car didn't start.

If a pig loses its voice…does it become disgruntled?

What happened when the ten-year-old cannibal spilled his soup? His mother gave him an earful.

There’s a disease that makes you uncontrollably tell airport jokes. No cure… it’s terminal.

I have a joke about trickle down economics. But 99% of you will never get it.

Did you heard about the giant that threw up? It's all over town!