The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes About Dads 👋

What type of music do the planets enjoy? Neptunes.

Dave was doing push up in a garden noticed a man intently observing him... Dave raised questioning eyebrows, the man said sorry to break it to you buddy but woman under you have long gone.

My wife and I had two miscarriages last year, and I believe there should be more jokes about miscarriages so we talk about it more... The only problem is most of the jokes die before you finish delivering them.—————————————————————*The title of the post is true and humor is how I deal with my pain*

I was sitting on the back porch with my wife when I suddenly blurted out, 'I love you.' 'Is that you or the beer talking?' she asked. I answered, 'It’s me… talking to my beer.'

Lost my job at the bank on my first day. A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

I wanted my kids to watch the orchestra, but I had to turn it off—too much sax and violins.

What does a lemon say when it answers the phone?' 'Yellow!'

Where do terrorists go when they die? Everywhere.

Niece: I have a lot of friends named Nathan, there’s Nathan…(endless droning about nicknames). Me: When they are together, do you call them The United Nathans?

You know, people say they pick their nose, but I feel like I was just born with mine.

I don’t trust stairs. They are always up to something.

I asked my date to meet me at the gym but she never showed up. I guess the two of us aren't going to work out.

My kid gave me a 'World's Best Dad' mug. At least she inherited my sense of humor.

My wife said my two biggest faults are I don’t listen and something else.

Marriage involves three rings: The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffer-ring.