The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes About Dads 👋
Celebrate fatherhood with our collection of dad jokes about dads! These hilarious, self-deprecating jokes poke fun at the quirks and classic moments of being a dad. Whether you’re a dad yourself or just love the humor that comes with fatherhood, our dad jokes about dads will have you laughing and groaning in equal measure. Perfect for sharing with fellow dads or just enjoying on your own, these jokes are all about embracing the dad life with a smile!
August 20, 2020: Scientists have discovered a "mystery object" in space. The object is equal to 2.6 solar masses. March 1, 2021: (Update) Scientists have determined that the “mystery object” is made up of unmatched socks.
Jack Daniels couldn't be with us this evening.... .....but he's here with us in spirit.
I recruited a nice little girl and her cute cuddly kitten to the flat earthers this weekend. I also figured out the brakes on my truck are overdue to be replaced.
In a very poor village in Vietnam, farmers had a feud because of a cow eating off the wrong rice paddy. One farmer got so upset he hired the local hitman to off the cow. The village was so poor the hitman had no guns, so killed the cow by bashing it with a porcelain figure.Police said it was the first case they ever saw of a Knick Knack Paddy Whack.
What do you call a dad who has fallen through the ice? A Popsicle
A teenage potato brings her boyfriend home to meet the parents. "So, what do you do for work?" asks the inquisitive father potato. “Oh, I work for a TV company as a sportscaster." The father potato is furious and tells the boyfriend to leave immediately. “Why did you do that daddy?!” shrieks the distraught daughter, eyes wide.The father shouts, “I’m not having *my* daughter hanging around with a commentator!"
Billy is the perfect name for a newborn goat. As a child, it'll be "Billy the Kid." As an adult, it'll be a "Billy Goat."
What do you call Batman when he's hurt? Bruised Wayne.
What does the dentist of the year get? A little plaque.
I want to go on record that I support farming. As a matter of fact, you could call me protractor.
Did you know the first French fries weren't actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
Have you heard about the chocolate record player? It sounds pretty sweet.
Whenever we drive past a graveyard my dad says, 'Do you know why I can't be buried there?' And we all say, 'Why not?' And he says, 'Because I'm not dead yet!'"
How many abominable snow monsters does it take to screw a lightbulb? Just one, but you have to believe in it first.
Why can't your hand be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.