The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes About Dads 👋
Celebrate fatherhood with our collection of dad jokes about dads! These hilarious, self-deprecating jokes poke fun at the quirks and classic moments of being a dad. Whether you’re a dad yourself or just love the humor that comes with fatherhood, our dad jokes about dads will have you laughing and groaning in equal measure. Perfect for sharing with fellow dads or just enjoying on your own, these jokes are all about embracing the dad life with a smile!
At the job interview, they asked me, “Where do you see yourself in five years?”
How many telemarketers does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but he has to do it during dinner.
My wife gave birth three times and still fits in her prom dress from high school. I gave birth zero times and I don’t fit in my pants from March.
What kind of shoes does a lazy person wear? Loafers.
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business.
My sister-in-law is an archaeologist. Only person I’ve known that is excited to find a bone in her chicken.
When is a car not a car? When it turns into a driveway!
What happened when the ten-year-old cannibal spilled his soup? His mother gave him an earful.
This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in there.
3 months ago, Senator McConnell took my rabbit. Mitch better have my bunny.
What do Barack Obama and Donald Trump have in common? Both are former presidents of the USA and both are harassed for the color of their skin.
Why would the Queen let Netflix use her likeness in "The Crown"? She probably gets royalties
Saw an old lady sitting alone in her front yard; in a canoe. I thought to myself... Now there's someone who could use a good paddle.
The police recently arrested a man selling "secret formula" tablets he claimed gave eternal youth. When going through their files they noticed it was the fifth time he was caught for committing this same criminal medical fraud.He had earlier been arrested in 1794, 1856, 1928 and 1983..
My wife was so excited that she pulled something out of her closet from 10 years ago that still fits.. "Can you believe it? After 10 years and it still fits!""Babe, it's a fucking scarf!"