The Best (and Worst) Dad Jokes That Make You Groan 👋

I hate my job, quality control at the strobe-light factory. I'm busy working like a cunt, and everyone else is just fucking standing still.

A doctor accidentally emailed the results of all his vasectomy patients to everyone on the internet. They were publicly desemenated.

Why can't you hear a psychiatrist using the bathroom? Because the 'P' is silent.

I used to have a job at a calendar factory but I got the sack because I took a couple of days off.

Q: Why is it hard to understand volunteers? A: Because they make no cents.

I have a fear of elevators, but I've started taking steps to avoid it.

I was excited to hear Apple might start selling its own cars until I learned they wouldn't support windows.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

This old guy I knew would always say, 'You know what really burns my ass?' He'd then hold his hand at butt level and say, 'A fire about this high.'

I'm reading a horror story in braille. Something bad is going to happen, I can just feel it.

I woke up confused and unable to smell I feel like nothing makes scents anymore

With all the bombings in Kabul, Afghanistan, authorities are planning to rename the city They’re aiming for Kabum

In an effort to play every famous person in the world, Tom Hanks has taken a new role In his ongoing effort to play every white man of any worthy note, Tom Hanks has be cast as Tom Hanks in his upcoming biopic

Given the current state of affairs, Santa needed something new to give to naughty children this year. Which is why he has decided to give out coalvid

A boy was born of an Indian, Chinese, Irish, and Italian grandmother... They couldn't settle on a name, until it hit them!They named him Ravi O. LeeSorry