The Best (and Worst) Daily Dad Joke of the Day 👋

Why do bakers work so hard? Because they knead dough.

What do houses wear? An address.

What do you call a cup of leaf juice that doesn’t want to be a dad? Absent-tea parent.

How does the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.

Where do fish keep their money? In a river bank.

Why are dogs afraid to go to space? Because of the vacuumEdit: Sorry if this joke is ruffDouble Edit: on the other hand, when I go to space I feel no pressure

The orange asked the melon: "Hey, want to get married?" The melon said: "Sorry, I canteloupe"

Did you hear about the California owl conspiracy network? They're calling themselves the "ca-hoots".

How Do Fish Get High? Seaweed

A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. When the police ask him what happened, the shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. It all happened so fast. '

Have you heard about the new corduroy pillows — they're making headlines!

How to catch a bear Dig a hole and fill it with ash. Surround the hole with peas. When the bear comes to take a pea kick him in the ash hole.

I hope we are all able to achieve our new year's resolution goals. But, I have a feeling we're going to drop the ball.

A UNIX Salesperson A unix salesperson named LenoreLoved her job, but loved the beach more.She devised such a wayto combine work and play:She sells C-shells by the seashore

True story. Chicago-area preschool teacher teaching remotely today because of the storms. Her dogs started barking like crazy, interrupting the Zoom. She looked out her window and told/apologized to the class that the shovelers were there. 4 year old classmate replies, “Wow, your shovelers sound like dogs!”Been laughing at that one all day.