The Best (and Worst) Lame & Dodgy Dad Jokes 👋

What’s tighter than a dead virgin? My alibi

Scientists transformed a tiger into a horse. Don't worry, it's in a stable condition.

I was banging this hot chick on her kitchen table when we heard the front door open. She said, "It's my husband! Quick, try the backdoor."Thinking back, I really should have ran but you don't get offers like that everyday.

My grandmother was extremely anti-Union. She always used to tell me that things “won’t get better if I picket”

Praying mantises don't actually pray, laughing hyenas don't actually laugh, and songbirds don't actually sing. The name Shih Tzu is accurate though.

A lady selling makeup at Macy's wouldn't stop bothering me. Boy, eyelashed out.

I asked my wife if I was the only one she slept with. She said yes-the others were 7's and 8's.

I asked the librarian if books about paranoia were avaiable.

Niece: I have a lot of friends named Nathan, there’s Nathan…(endless droning about nicknames). Me: When they are together, do you call them The United Nathans?

I went to a smoke shop only to discover it’d been replaced by an apparel store.

When does a joke become a dad joke? When it becomes apparent.'

This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in.'

Not sure if you have noticed, but I love bad puns. That’s just how eye roll.

I talk to myself because sometimes I just need expert advice.

Clothes, but no cigar.