The Best (and Worst) Really Bad & Awful Dad Jokes 👋

A man stumbles out of a bar on St. Patrick’s day, bumps into a policeman, and burps right in his face! The cop, though startled, calmly directs him to a taxi without issue. There was a presumption of Guinness hints.

I wouldn't buy anything with velcro. It's a total rip-off.'

I had to sell my vacuum cleaner. All it was doing was gathering dust.

Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.

A joke about a shutdown coin factory. Nevermind.It makes no cents.

For Sale: Starter motor for Perpetual Motion Machine. Only used once.

Two Blonde Girls chatting. Blonde 1: I understand how you get Bob from Robert& Bill from William, but how do you get Dick from Richard?Blonde 2: Show him your Pussy.....

Santa's wife divorced him after he cheated on her for the fourth time She could handle the first three ho's but the last one was just too much.

Someone just shoved a bomb into a bull's ass. Just abominable.

If we don't proofread and correct mistakes The errorists win.

My lord, my client is a liftman and this complainant walked in the elevator wearing low cleavage blouse showing ample amount of her breasts" "Then she caught him checking at them and said angrily'Stop staring at them and press one quickly ' .And my client did exactly that. I rest my case ".

Not to brag but I made six figures last year. I was also named worst employee at the toy factory.

After an unsuccessful harvest, why did the farmer decide to try a career in music? Because he had a ton of sick beets.

What room is useless for a ghost? A living room xD

I was interrogated over the theft of a cheese toastie. Man, they really grilled me.