The Best (and Worst) Dad Knock-Knock Jokes 👋

I used to be able to play piano by ear, but now I have to use my hands.

A joke I made up 20 min ago Me: “I’m going to tie a bell on the tip of my penis!”Wife: “WTF!?! Why?!”Me: “I know it’ll be kind of annoying at first, but trust me, it’ll become a-dick-ting!”

You're lost in the middle of the woods at night, alone. The sky is cloudy, there are no trails, no map, no cell phone and no GPS. No sign of a city in any direction. How do you get back to civilization? You tell an old joke out loud, wait a couple of minutes and follow any of the angry redditors shouting "repost!" back to civilization.

My girlfriend and I have been really stressed and having some issues so we decided to take a mini vacation, a weekend trip to a ski resort. Everything started off well, but things went downhill really fast.

Got my stimulus check on St. Patrick’s Day Call that luck of the IRS.

A cop started crying while he was writing me a ticket. I asked him why and he said, It's a moving violation.

During my calculus test, I had to sit between identical twins. It was hard to differentiate between them.

What's the only island you can drive to? Rhode Island.

A magician was walking down the street — then he turned into a store.

I have a joke about a roof, but it would just go over your head.

I have a joke about a roof, but it would just go over your head.

Two guys walked into a bar. The third guy ducked.

I have a joke about a roof, but it would just go over your head.

I was once a personal trainer, until I gave a too-weak notice.

What happens when doctors get frustrated? They lose their patients.