The Best (and Worst) Daily Dad Joke of the Day 👋

Where do math teachers go on vacation? Times Square.

“Knock, knock. ' “Who’s there? ' “Ayatollah. ' “Ayatollah who? ' “Ayatollah you already. '

A priest, a pastor and a rabbit walked in to a blood donation clinic. A priest, a pastor and a rabbit walked in to blood donation clinic.The nursed asked the rabbit: "What is your blood type?""I am probably a type O" said the rabbit.

Putin visits Estonia Immigration officer says: "Name?". "Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin". "Address?" "Kremlin, Moscow, Russia". "Occupation?" "No, this time just visiting".

What do you call a squash that can't get married? Cant elope

What is Batman’s least favorite food? A: Chinese takeout

If anybody is alone during the festive period please don't hesitate to let me know. I need to borrow some chairs.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours Nacho cheese.

Pope: paint me a beautiful art on the ceiling of the Sistine chapel and I will reward your work with exposure. **Michaelangelo:** uhh sure sir, I will paint you a beautiful ceiling sir.**Also Michaelangelo, mildly infuriated:** gonna paint a bunch of dudes with their dick's out talking bout reward with exposure. Fuck you. Pay me.

I reported my discovery of a new Dwarf Star to the Astronomy Society, so they let me name it. I am gonna call it Peter Twinklage.

A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before. What can I get for you?" Pop,goes the weasel.

A young man robbed a bank wearing a suit made of many mirrors, but he turned himself in after taking some time to reflect. Luckily, the judge was lenient... ...as he saw a lot of himself in the young man.

I hope someone comes across this distress signal Damn it, I used the wrong flare

Who's the only organization with a higher death rate than PETA? The Make-A-Wish foundation.

What was the first mention of tennis in the Bible? When Joseph served in Pharoah’s court.