The Best (and Worst) Flirty Dad Jokes 👋

What kind of doctor is Dr. pepper? A fizzician!I’ll see myself outEdit: I guess adding mentos to this joke was a good idea...Thanks for the gold and silvers!Happy New Years y’all!

I asked my wife if I was the only one she slept with. She said yes—the others were 7’s and 8’s.

A son tells his father, 'I have an imaginary girlfriend.' The father sighs and says, 'You know, you could do better.' 'Thanks Dad,' the son says. 'That means a lot.' The father shakes his head and goes, 'I was talking to your girlfriend.'

A son tells his father, 'I have an imaginary girlfriend.' The father sighs and says, 'You know, you could do better.' 'Thanks Dad,' the son says. 'That means a lot.' The father shakes his head and goes, 'I was talking to your girlfriend.'

My girlfriend dresser up as a policewoman and placed me under arrest for the suspicion of being good in bed. After a couple minutes all charges were dropped due to lack of evidence

I was flirting really well with this woman in the bar. "Do you want me to show you a good time?" she asked."Of course, babe," I grinned eagerly."Get your stopwatch out then," she snapped, "and see how long it takes me to get to the other side of the club."

A married couple is sitting at the kitchen table The woman asks her husband: "Tell me, what did you think when you first saw me?" The man replies: "I thought - damn, I would like to suck her tits dry and fuck her brains out."The woman blushes and asks: "What do you think now?"The man says: "I think, I did a pretty good job with that."

Hillary says it's time to have a woman in the Oval Office. Bill says - been there, done that ...

Strippers don't use air conditioners... Only fans

Am I the only man my wife has ever dated? Unfortunately yes, she said the others were all nines or tens!

Your mom and I let astrology get between us. It just Taurus apart.

My girlfriend wanted me to treat her like she was special... ...so I got her a helmet and a box of crayons!

I walked up to a woman in a bar and said “hey, baby, if you were a fruit you’d be a fine-apple.” She responded “and if you were a fruit, women would rejoice.”

I said to my wife “You are my drug” She said: “Oh wow is it because you can’t get enough of me?”I replied: “No because you cost so much money and you’re ruining my life”

Does anybody know where a guy can find a person to hang out with, talk to, and enjoy spending time with? I'm just asking for a friend.