The Best (and Worst) Horrible & Terrible Dad Jokes 👋
Prepare for the most horrible & terrible dad jokes that are so bad, they’re hilarious! These jokes are filled with cheesy punchlines and puns that will make you laugh, groan, and possibly question your life choices. Perfect for anyone who loves the charm of truly awful humor, our horrible & terrible dad jokes are guaranteed to deliver a fun (if not slightly cringeworthy) experience. Explore the worst of dad jokes and enjoy the groans they bring!
My wife gave birth three times and still fits in her prom dress from high school. I gave birth zero times and I don’t fit in my pants from March.
NSFW There once lived a man from Nantucket Who decided one day to say "Fuck it."He climbed up to the top,Fell down with a hop,And that's how he kicked the bucket.
Why are the bathrooms so quiet at Pfizer headquarters? ....Because the P is silent. (a 12 year old told me this after I got my Pfizer vaccine)
I climbed the stairs and saw a man standing on the edge about to jump. "Don't do it!" I screamed. "Your life is worth more than that!"Anyway, then he jumped, and I was escorted down from the diving board.
My kink went from gross to illegal I like to have my face touched...by 6 feet
Yo mamma so hairy She gotta comb her wrist to see what time it is
Everyone in our little town was shocked and horrified that the local butcher got busted for selling drugs. I had seen Pete once a week like clockwork for over a decade, never even knew he was a butcher.
Zeke, the bank manager, was dismissing his accountant... "I don't know what the world is coming to, isn't anybody honest?" He asked. "Where were you educated?""Yale," replied the young accountant."Such a grand university - what is your name?""Yim Yohansen" replied the accountant.
What is about 6 inches long, hard, hairy at the base and is pushed into a moist opening where it is quickly moved back and forth? A toothbrush
I asked a homeless girl if I could take her home... The smile on her face vanished when I took away her cardboard box.
What does a crab have in common with a Chinese guy who gets run over by a bus? They're both crushed Asians.
A man forgot to zip his trousers... so a lady told him politely... “Sir your garage is open.” The man gave her a naughty smile and zipped his trousers and asked.. “Did you see my Range Rover parked inside?”The lady smiled back and said..“No, just one small Toyota with two flat tires.”
Someone told me to go back to my own country So Iran
I have a new starter business idea that's going to go viral! It's a unique product, created by harvesting the eggs from dead women… I'm calling it: Cadaviar.
My friend caught me slipping laxatives into his food the other night. All he said was “You’re shitting me right.”