The Best (and Worst) Lame & Dodgy Dad Jokes 👋

Communists jokes on internet aren't memes They're ourours

Little Ahmed is doing his biology homework. He comes upon a question: "What separates the head from the body?"Ahmed answers: "The axe"

One of my patients forgot their stool sample today I guess some people just don’t give a shit

Milk did it, but Tropicana wouldn't put missing children posters on their bottles. They said nobody wanted to hear that OJ is looking for kids.

I said to my wife “You are my drug” She said: “Oh wow is it because you can’t get enough of me?”I replied: “No because you cost so much money and you’re ruining my life”

Did you know I can fly on United Airlines from Los Angles to New York in just 60 seconds? I even called and asked how long it would take, she told me "just a minute"

Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him,what virtue would I be showing?" Student : "Brotherly love".

I'm down to eating only one meal per day. It's 56 courses and it takes me two days to finish.

My girlfriend and I got in a car accident because she was giving me a blow job She probably shouldn’t have been driving

Why don’t they use big fans to blow air on windmills for energy? Engineers can’t agree on a wind-wind situation.

I'd like to have kids one day. I don't think I could stand them any longer than that, though.

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter? An irrelephant.'

My hotel tried to charge me ten dollars extra for air conditioning. That wasn’t cool.

I hate Velcro. It's a rip off.